Unfortunately for all of you, I’m not doing Blogmas because I don’t have enough creativity to post every day. The glorious Nicole tagged me in her second Blogmas post to do the Christmas tag. I thought it would be a nice way to get involved without, you know, actually having to do anything. Nicole, being the fearsome blogging machine she is, will be posting every day until 2019! If you want some premium content for the festive season I’d suggest you head over there post haste.
In the spirit of the season, though, you can enjoy this festive post from me and marvel at what a blessed Christmas angel I am.
1. Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts?
Of course, the first question is a difficult one. There’s anxiety around both – I mean, it wouldn’t be me if there wasn’t. In general I’d say giving, but I have an extremely annoying habit of convincing myself that people hate whatever I’ve got them. I also worry that people will think I’m doing that with what they’ve got me. So, you know. Nice and normal. I get concerned my reactions won’t be right, and I’m constantly trying to read others to see if I got the right gift. Now I think about it, it’s quite tiring. Who’d have thought?
2. Do you make and stick to new year’s resolutions?
No. I don’t really see the point in waiting until a new year to do something or make a change. I’ve tried them in the past but never stick to them. I’d rather have general goals or ideas about how I’d like the year to look. Of course, when you’re as mental as three frogs in a slipper then there’s not a lot that can be done to plan things.
3. Have you ever made a snowman?
Yes. It isn’t really snowy enough these days (hi, global warming) but I definitely have in the past. I can’t remember the last time I did, sadly, but if I ever do again I’ll make sure to get photographic evidence.
4. Is your Christmas tree real or fake, and what theme do you prefer?
My tree is fake, I bought it when I had my first flat on my own. It’s not particularly grand, but it does the job. I don’t like the idea of chopping down trees just for a few weeks then throwing them out. However, I’m also trying to reduce how much plastic I use. That means my less-than-glamourous bargain bin fake tree will be with me until it’s truly on its last legs. After that, I’m not sure. If I had some outdoor space I’d consider a real one and trying to keep it alive, but I don’t know how well that would go.
I don’t really have a theme. I’ve had the same baubles for several years and there are silver, blue, turquoise, pink, and purple ones in the pack. Once those are on I put on the random decorations I’ve got from holiday or from my mum. Mercifully, these also include some of the decorations we used to put on the family tree as kids, so I’ve got some great nostalgia in there too.
5. Most memorable holiday moment?
Honestly, I don’t know. My memory isn’t great these days, and our festive seasons have followed similar patterns for most of my life with little interruption or disruption. Going out into town one Christmas eve then coming home and drinking port with my sister on the kitchen floor whilst we harassed our elderly cat was a good moment, though. The hangover the next day, less so.
6. What holiday traditions are you looking forward to this year?
I’m looking forward to maybe making some new traditions. This is the first time in thirteen years living here that I’ll be in Liverpool for Christmas, so it’ll be nice to do something different and make our own traditions. We’ll be spending the day with the extended Mr Seeds clan, and we’re in Yorkshire with my family for a few days beforehand.
It’s not really a tradition, but every Christmas day I look forward to having a sandwich with leftover bits of the Christmas dinner. Before anyone asks, yes, that does include roast potatoes in a sandwich and I’ll hear nothing against it. After that I’m usually the only one awake as my family indulge in a traditional festive nap.
A longstanding family tradition is for my sister and I to wrap each other’s gifts really badly, using as much toilet roll as we can. One year, I took it next level and just wrapped a toilet roll up for her. My mum’s started joining in with this now, too. What sentimental family traditions do you have? Oh, not much, just using shit rag to wrap presents. You?
7. What is the best Christmas present you have ever received?
For pure accuracy, I’d go for the teddy bear I got one year when I was a (weird) child. I’d asked in my Christmas letter for a teddy that was precisely 40cm tall. To this day I have absolutely no idea why. Anyway, I got a lovely teddy who I named Tessa. I don’t know if I actually measured her, but she’s still at my parents’ house so I’ll get the measuring tape out and update you all.
8. What are your favourite holiday foods?
Despite having been vegan for the past couple of Christmases, my favourite foods haven’t really changed. I love mince pies (warm, with a bit of cream). Stuffing is absolute bae, even if it’s not dissimilar in texture to a nut roast. I still have to have it. Sprouts can unequivocally fuck off. You can slap some sort of festive-looking label on some junk food and I’ll be all over it, honestly. I really like having party food as well, Christmas is a great excuse to eat weird miniature things and pretend it’s a real meal.
9. What is your favourite Christmas film?
Hmm, that’s a tough one. The last few years I’ve made sure to re-read A Christmas Carol around the festive period, and if there’s any kind of film version of that knocking about I’ll probably watch it. I’m pretty much over Love, Actually by now. Its omnipresence at Christmas hooked me in for a while, but now it’s just unbearably smug. I do like Gremlins and The Nightmare Before Christmas. I don’t think I have a favourite, there isn’t anything I feel compelled to watch every year. My list on Netflix is currently full to bursting with all the terrible Christmas shite they’ve made, so perhaps that’ll bring a new festive favourite. My money is definitely on The Princess Switch as a winner this year.
10. What is your favourite Christmas song?
Right. There are a few staples, again I’m not sure I can pick a favourite. Important Christmas songs for me go as thus:
Chris De Burgh – A Spaceman Came Travelling
The Waitresses – Christmas Wrapping
The Pogues & Kirsty MacColl – Fairytale of New York
Jonah Lewie – Stop the Cavalry
Blink 182 – Happy Holidays, You Bastard
All classic crimbo bangers. Crackers, if you will. It’s equally important to enjoy Bad Religion’s Christmas album, and a variety of other alternative offerings. Being a mosher is not just for life, it’s also for Christmas.
11. What is your favourite thing about Christmas?
Not having to go to work. Oh, wait. I don’t have to do that anyway because I’m a sadsack.
I do like spending time with family, but let’s be real here. The best thing about Christmas is being able to eat and drink whatever the fuck you want at weird times of the day ‘because it’s Christmas.’ It’s being able to incorporate glitter into my makeup as a 31 year old woman and not be judged for it. It’s sitting in cosy pubs with hideous Christmas decorations feeling either smug because you finished your shopping, or drinking away the stress of not having started yet.
My friends and I always have a pre-Christmas get together, and I love that as well. I manage the friends and family balance pretty well. Thankfully this no longer includes having to go to the pub in my hometown on Christmas eve and talk to a bunch of arseholes I purposefully haven’t seen since school.
12. What would be your dream place to visit at Christmas time?
Your mum’s house. Failing that (I know she’s busy at this time of year), somewhere nice and cold. I know a lot of people would say Lapland or New York, both of which I wouldn’t turn down but also wouldn’t necessarily choose myself. Maybe some kind of animal shelter where I could shower animals with festive love and be covered in delightful fluffy friends.
13. Who do you spend Christmas with?
Traditionally, my family. That’s me, mum and dad, and my sister. Last year we switched it up, and Mr Seeds joined us as well. This year, my sister got married so her and the ‘hubs’ are going to Paris for actual Christmas, and we’re having our family get together a couple of days before. So, this Christmas I’ll be with Mr Seeds’ lot, as I mentioned earlier. There are actual children on his side of the family, as opposed to just my sister and I acting like teenagers for a few days. That will either be novel or terrifying.
14. When do you start getting excited for Christmas?
That is very much dependent on my mental state. Honestly, I haven’t really felt excitement for Christmas for some time. Yes, I’m old. I’m also depressed, jaded, and poor. So, I’m not really in full festive swing yet (or ever). I think I’ll be more excited when I’m at my parents’ and my blood slowly starts getting replaced with prosecco.
15. You have one Christmas wish- what will it be?
I could be selfish and wish for stability for myself – in terms of income, my health, whatever. Maybe I’d be generous and wish for world peace or to eradicate racism. I could just wish that a cat would turn up outside on Christmas day and decide it wants to move in with me.
I think what I’d choose is probably the selfish one, though. Happy holidays, you bastards. I’ll wish for you once mine’s come true. ‘Tis the season!